Quarterflash - Quarterflash

Fall of 2006. Tipp-C.

Quarterflash – Quarterflash
Geffen Records 1981

Rock music trivia is the one kind of knowledge that I seem to retain very easily. For some reason obscure facts about music seem to stick with me. For example, did you know that, before his death in 1970, Jimi Hendrix was interested in, and rumored to be joining, prog rock goliaths Emerson, Lake, and Palmer? They were even set to be called HELP (Hendrix, Emerson, Lake, and Palmer). At this point in my life I would have severe trouble trying to do long division by hand, but I will forever know that in the late 1970s and early 1980s Diamond David Lee Roth and the rest of the Van Halen boys would have had a heart attack if they found brown M&M’s in their backstage M&M’s bowl. So, when I found out that this month’s random pick had actually made a decent-sized splash in the music world in the early 80s, I was surprised.

“Have you ever heard of Quarterflash,” I asked a fellow co-worker, who is also very knowledgeable in all things music, only a day after I had purchased the album.

Without hesitation, he replied, “Yes, ‘Harden My Heart.’”

Sure enough, Quarterflash’s 1981 self-titled debut album is platinum and contains two Top Forty Hits, the aforementioned “Harden My Heart” and “Find Another Fool.” Who knew? Well, my co-worker did.

The Quarterflash cover features four identical images of a glowing man standing in a field. This is probably some kind of political statement relating to nuclear war, or more than likely just a play on their name, but the very first thing that I thought was, “Cool, these guys look like the mail-away Spirit Of Obi-Wan Kenobi action figure that Frito-Lay gave out in the late 1990’s.” That was a pretty sweet deal for only two UPC symbols and $1.99.

This is actually above average turn-of-the-decade pop music. Quarterflash isn’t on the level of Rick Springfield or the Cars, but they are decent none the less. I can understand why the hits were hits and why the album moved a few copies. “Valerie” (not a misspelled Monkees cover) is a great pop song. Heavy on the guitars and light on the keys. Even though the song “Cruisin’ With The Deuce” conjures up images of a cross country trip in an RV with a broken toilet, it’s quite the catchy ditty.

Sorry to say, but saxophone is my least favorite instrument. I can’t explain quite why, but I do not necessarily enjoy when it invades my auditory canals. It ranks just behind hearing a horrific car wreck and listening to a Jay Leno monologue. Okay, I’m not a total saxophobe, but 90% of the time that I hear sax in a pop song it bores me to tears. This is Quarterflash’s downfall: lots of long, drawn out sax solos courtesy of singer Rindy Ross. While the band is tight in a musical sense, as guitarists Marv Ross and Jack Charles work well with drummer Brian David Willis and bassist Rich Gooch (no relation the “The Gooch” of Diff’rent Strokes fame), the stale sax is just too tedious.

“At least I am going to get a spiffy official Geffen logo-imprinted dust sleeve for my Appetite For Destruction vinyl,” is what I first thought when I picked up Quarterflash and slid the record out of the cardboard sleeve for inspection. What I got was a pleasant experience, save the sax, and another band to put in my memory bank. If “Harden My Heart” ever pops up during a game of Trivial Pursuit, I’m gonna be all over that one. Not bad for an album that is “dedicated to all the Seafood lovers in the Northwest.”