Keel - The Right To Rock
Gold Mountain, LTD. 1985
I have to make a confession. Thanks to VH-1’s 40 Least Metal Moments, Keel is not a completely new entity in my world. You see, Ron Keel was supposedly a bad ass metal singer back in the day until he betrayed his metal roots and attempted to forge a solo career as a country crooner using the moniker Ronnie Lee Keel. This traitorous act earned him a place on VH-1’s list of “least metal” moments. Despite the fact that I knew about his turn to the dark side… er, or his turn away from the dark side, depending on how you look at it, I had never actually heard a note of Keel’s music. Well, there’s no time like the present.
Based purely on the facts that Keel’s second offering was produced by Gene Simmons (yes, that Gene Simmons) and that the record is titled The Right To Rock, one would think that this album should automatically be in contention for the title of the greatest album of all-time. Step aside Pet Sounds, Revolver, and Dark Side Of The Moon, Keel is here to rock. After all, it is their right.
By looking at the flipside of the album cover, one can deduce that they certainly look ready to rock. Red leather, belts with metal studs that are clearly not looped properly, handcuffs, white fingerless gloves, and, well, it’s hard to tell what kind of footwear they have on (probably boots of the leather variety) because they are standing in smoke. One sure way to tell that a band is serious about its image is if they credit their hairstylists and makeup artists on the album sleeve. I can safely say that Robert P. Richleigh did an admirable job on Keel’s hair, while Sanna’s makeup work is slightly underwhelming. Due to Ron Keel’s gray and ashen face I’m just going to have to guess that Sanna used an ultra-matte foundation, as opposed to an oil-based foundation that would have better matched Mr. Keel’s natural skin tone. Amateur.
If you can imagine what a band would sound like if they had one of the greatest metal singers on Earth, a relentless twin guitar attack, and a bass player who is more than capable of writing a good song, then you’d be imagining Iron Maiden. Unfortunately, Keel does not possess any of these skills. Instead, they come across as a mix of a watered-down AC/DC and a Sebastian Bach-less Skid Row, as evidenced by the title track, “The Right To Rock.” Apparently, being in a rock band in 1985 meant that you were “Fighting for justice and the American way.” Terrorists be damned! Keel then takes their American pride one step further by purposely butchering the Stones classic, “Let’s Spend The Night Together.” Take that, England! At least I hope that was on purpose.
Not surprisingly, Keel only lasted a few albums before Ronnie Lee Keel made his debut as country singer. Sadly, his stints in Keel, and as a country musician, were artistic masterpieces compared to his first go-around in the music biz: vocalist for Yngwie J. Malmsteen’s Steeler. Yikes. Keel’s The Right to Rock would normally get one star, but I had to deduct a half star because they use Peavey amps.
